Our Intended Path

The mind's ability to fool itself knows almost no boundaries, but eventually the lucky among us come to our senses.  The smoke fades and we see things for how they really are.
Whether by words of wisdom or the flicker of a flashlight, we muddle through the fog and land on the long and winding road we're meant to travel.  However baffling, we learn to trust the path or at least stay on it.  And having no earthly clue where it's heading means we'll never be lost.
At least not for long.

On the Dalai Lama

It's late and I can't sleep.  Thoughts of recent weeks keep running around my head threatening to make it explode and all I can do to calm myself is read the teachings of His Holiness the Dalai Lama XIV.  Some of the things I'm reading are longer articles or treatises if you will, while others are the quotes that are so often recited and their wonder exists in their pure simplicity.   Of the ones that I've been reading tonight, some of my favorites are:


“Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.”

"There is a saying in Tibetan, 'Tragedy should be utilized as a source of strength.'
No matter what sort of difficulties, how painful experience is, if we lose our hope, that's our real disaster.”

“When we meet real tragedy in life, we can react in two ways--either by losing hope and falling into self-destructive habits, or by using the challenge to find our inner strength.”

“Only the development of compassion and understanding for others can bring us the tranquility and happiness we all seek.”

"Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible."

Simple, I know.  But sometimes it is the simple teachings, sayings, or pieces of advice that allow us to make the tiny course corrections that can lead to greater changes in our lives. 

Wonder

 
What is unleashed in the soul when we love outside ourselves is sharp, unexpected, and beyond words.
Love turns smart people stupid and conjures courage from thin air.
That we can love so wildly, so recklessly, yet feel it in the tame ways of everyday is something of a miracle.
For some, a miracle, ordinary or otherwise, would take a miracle. 
Still there's room for repentance.  There's hope, if only in glimmers.
For others, hope is all there is.
But I find that as life pushes relentlessly on, words like love, hope, and miracle nudge their way in and set up shop.  As undeniable as moon tides.
The pie-in-the-sky magical thinking of childhood is quietly replaced by a grounded, grown-up sense of wonder. 
And the reality that something as simple as a sunrise can still surprise you.

Trust

Trust [truhst] noun

1. reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence.

2. confident expectation of something; hope.

3. a person on whom or thing on which one relies.

4. the condition of one to whom something has been entrusted.

Love [luhv] noun, verb; loved, lov·ing.

1. a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.

2. a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend.

3. sexual passion or desire.

4. a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person; sweetheart.

After all is said and done, they are two words with different definitions.  However, one cannot exist with the other.  

Catharsis

Catharsis

ca-thar-sis [kuh-thar-sis]

noun, plural -ses
 

-the purging of the emotions or relieving of emotional tensions.

And this is how we do it in Texas:

 

Walls

We spend a lifetime putting up walls. With every tremor, every earthquake, they grow taller, more impenetrable.

Experience teaches us to be careful of people and Trojan horses.

With time we come to depend on these walls, rely on their protection. Until one day a boy walks by, touches the stone. The walls come tumbling down.

-unknown

Five on the Fifth: December 2011

So it's the 5th of December and time for another edition of Five on the 5th.  Blogger Stephen Chapman who writes the blog The State of the Nation UK organizes a monthly photofest of sorts.  It's called "Five on the 5th" and it is five random photographs taken from your life on or in the days leading up to the fifth of each month.  This month's optional theme is "Winter Weekend."  This is apparently the final installment of Five on the 5th, as Stephen is mulling about options to replace the photofest with something else.  Something equally as fun, I'm sure.

This month finds me back in London on an extended stay, enjoying some shenanigans with friends around the city.  My photos mainly follow the optional theme and, as always, are posted without comment.

No Person is an Island

I recently got back from a trip to San Francisco, CA for the wedding of a very dear friend of mine.  Throughout the weekend of events I realized that it wasn't simply the wedding of a good friend, but the coming together of two communities of people.  Not just two families celebrating the union of their son and their daughter, but also the communities from which these two people are active and committed members. What really made me realize this joining of communities was the role that all the guests present for the wedding weekend played in making it a reality.  From checking in guests and assigning them to the appropriate retreat houses to preparing and cleaning up after meals to leading a yoga practice to officiating at the wedding to decorating the reception hall to...  The list can go on and on and on.  But in the end, the people there for the wedding helped ensure that the wedding happened with as few hiccups as possible.  And were there to "troubleshoot" and fix any problems that happened to arise.

And this got me to thinking about relationships within the context of community.  For not only is the relationship of two people something between those two people, but also of the communities from which they come.  The communities can be large and complex or just a small, close-knit friend group.  But it is important that those two groups come together and support the love, compassion, and passion of their members, for those two people are representing the shared values and beliefs of the communities.  Communities are the result of the people that make them up and the people are in turn impacted by the communities they build and the people with which they choose to associate. 

It makes me think of the importance of maintaining openness and honesty within one's relationship with one's partner, but extending that communication to those from one's community.  For while we each will hold our partners to the agreed-upon standards of the relationship and will love and support our partners during times of struggle to facilitate growth, it truly does take a village.  If those in our community don't know what is going on with one of their members, how can they help out in times of need?

I know friends that like to keep various aspects of their relationship private from their friends - to hold back those details of internal strife and struggle that arise now and then within all relationships, intimate or not.  And that makes me wonder how true growth can happen for if one only hears one's own voice while processing things, only one point of view is being considered.  For true growth to occur, many different points of view and ways of dealing with things should be considered.  Or at least heard.  And who better to offer support and advice than those people most close to one's heart - the people of one's community.

At the end of the day, I know that my dear friend and his partner are well-supported and loved within their communities.  And I know that their ability to communicate, seek advice, and process things will enable them to nurture and grow their relationship, their love, their connection, and the connection of their two communities.  For no person is an island and it really does take a village.

Five on the Fifth

 

So it's the 5th of October and time for another edition of Five on the 5th.  Blogger Stephen Chapman who writes the blog The State of the Nation UK organizes a monthly photofest of sorts.  It's called "Five on the 5th" and it is five random photographs taken from your life on or in the days leading up to the fifth of each month.  This month's optional theme is "Pleasure."

 

It's been a few months since I've participated in this.  Finishing my dissertation for grad school took a bit out of me, but I'm now in the process of exhaling after completing such a task, so I'm hoping to keep up with this a bit more regularly.

As seems to be my take, my photos are a combination of the optional theme and just a random selection of pics taken from my life in the past few days.  As always, though, they are posted without comment.

Foxholes

In our lives, everyone of us draws a circle.
Inside it are your people,
the people you fight for, the ones you protect, no matter what.
As you get older, your circle gets smaller and smaller.
People grow up, or they don't.
They fall by the wayside or just drift off, one day at a time.
But those who stay, through thick and thin, and everything in between...
those are the ones you want in the fox hole,
when the walls come tumbling down...