Sometimes my heart beats faster...

And my left eye flutters...

On Wandering Minds

On Sígur Rós

To say they were amazing in concert is an understatement.  So breathtakingly spectacular!!!

I smiled.  I cried.  I laughed and cried at the same time.  Oh the beauty of it all...

On Correcting An Error

Fear can hold you prisoner.  Hope can set you free.

On Laughter

"I remember being so glad to be with a fellow yogi who wasn't afraid to laugh at the precariousness of being a yoga teacher and a human being.  We sat in the grass and we laughed."

-someone smarter than me

On Being Built By the Gods

Me: (working with a client, explaining the next exercise).
Him: Do you see that girl?
Me: What girl?
Him: The blonde.  She's checking you out, hardcore!  Looking you up and down.
Me: Okay... Do your set.

[After the set]

Him: Seriously, you're lucky to have girls checking you out like that.
Me: (in my head) Seriously?!?!

Next client, having overheard the conversation: Does he not know?
Me: I guess not.  Oh well.
Her: Well, your legs have been chiselled by the Gods! Of course she was checking you out.
Me: I can't help that I'm just drawn this way.

On Being Lost

There are times when I feel like all is lost.  There are times when I feel like nothing is worth it.  There comes a time when I feel lonely, even in the midst of people.

Right now is not one of those times.

The whirlwind of change that is rushing through my life is exhilarating.  It is invigorating.  It is inspiring.  It is overwhelming.

But that is what change is all about.  How the dust is going to settle I don't know.  How the whole picture will look after the pieces come together I don't know.  How I'll handle the blinding yet energizing sunshine now that my blindfold has been lifted I'm not sure.

But finding out is what makes it all so exciting.

On Being Never Not Broken

Akhilandeshvari: Goddess of Never Not Broken, or The Always Broken Goddess

The brokenness of Akhilanda isn't a brokenness of weakness, fear, or terror.  It is the brokenness that tears us apart, disrupting the ruts, routines, and rituals of our everyday life.  Those things that so often stunt our personal growth and can prove to be toxic to the development and pursuit of personal goals and achievements.  Repeating the same relationships (friendly or intimate) over and over; maintaining the same habits for years upon years; not performing some sort of introspection on a regular and routine basis to identify whether we are on the right path for our lives to achieve those goals and become the best people we can become.

The story of Akhilanda is that when we experience a devastating loss, are torn apart by some experience in our life, or we witness our envisioned future dissolve before our very eyes, we have the opportunity to choose the manner in which we will put ourselves together.  We can learn from our past that has brought us to this heaped up pile of broken pieces.  We can look forward to what had been our visions of the future.  But really, we are in a state of flux.  We are changing.  We are learning to flow through life like a river runs its course, over and around the obstacles of life; learning from the confusion of life.  For how can we ever learn and grow if we already have everything figured out.

But it is also important to recognize that this newly pieced together person is only an illusion.  This new being we create for ourselves is only temporary.  For we will break again.  We will fall apart.  We will in some way see our future dissolve and develop a new one in its wake.  For we are never not broken.  And that is the beauty and the power of Akhilanda.  We have the strength and the power to reinvent ourselves as often as we need to in order to make the course corrections in life to find the path that is right for us.

On Love

"Those that go searching for love only make manifest their own lovelessness, and the loveless never find love, only the loving find love, and they never have to see for it."

-D.H. Lawrence

On Courage

"History, despite its wrenching pain, cannot be unlived. But if faced with courage, need not be lived again."

-Maya Angelou